Monday, October 26, 2009

LOVE SICK



SHE : huh !! what on earth made u to do that??
why on earth u told to me ?

ganapathy : I was not on earth when i told it to u :) you want me to say again..

she : enough i'm sick of it , i'm sick hearing ur dialogues. stop it .

ganapathy : u know what a toll it took for me to tell that??

she : y me then ???

ganapathy : bcos i love you :)

she : see ... u got

[ before she could complete he pushes her against a wall and locks the two sides with his hand , she resists but unable to move ... he moves his face close to her ... she could feel his warm breadth - she was feeling lighter , she was lifting herself up, all her blood was rushing towards her cheek , ok she s now ready to go - she made her move near him ; suddenly he went back saying " u know i'm looking so beautifull in your EYEs "

she was taken by suprise , but somehow regained her composure and gave a thin smile just ending within lips .... he started to move n she was watching him till the end of the corridor .. ]


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ganapathy's poem for her

" i see ur image all over sky ,

but i cant touch it.

i smell ur fragrance in my mind

but only fragrance is not LIFE "

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p.s - After the sad last post , i want to cheer up myself , thats y a romantic part about our romantic guy.

Where Am I ??


....complete darkness , its so dark than the dark. I can see nothing inside , i felt hostile and wanna get out of it but i insist to go on... For a while it was so silent , i kept my hand near ears to hear any sound .
I could hear Nothing not even whistling sound of the breeze , it struck later the place i'm now has no air - the space is VACCUM . I started to fear whether this is Hell??

just waited for something to happen ... not suddenly , slowly i started to see rays of light dispersing and taking forms to be precise irregular forms . It was not continuous just flickering of images n sound ... I started to focus on images and made out some images like

- i'm smiling with friends

- hear a music track probably Raja's songs

- a gal comes into view , its glaring so i shrink my eyes n see it again "oh god" its her how she s hear ?? i never knew she s here , i thought she left long before

- a group of people stand there staring at me , i went close n saw - they were all people
who i hate on earth

-i see myself now , i'm looking good at 50 a bit bald but still fit with stiff shoulders n ordering men

- then i see hitler , achilles , alexander all standing near to one another

- then all Hollywood celebrity smiling at me

- ah ! there stands actress sridevi , she s still young there

- on the other side all my friends r sitting together n chatting

- lots of books and lots of schedule written here n there of what to be done

- Now hear lots of bad words ; a voice s scolding me for being lazy , not even moving single page a day , the voice questions my confidence n whether i got any brains after all ...

I cant take more - i hit back the Voice by saying FUCKING RETARD ! FUCK YOURSELF ..

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Now i'm back to this world . Shit ! thought to attempt to know what is in our mind n went inside ,,, che thu .... its a fucking worst place than outside , no happiness there too....

AS final yr mbbs exams r nearing i find all the places are making me uncomfortable ... I say many times a day that everyone has changed , noone minds others , my friends all are living in their own island so n so.... i am obviously stressing myself , urging myself to change ..

Every day i woke up saying today i must change- but i dont know what to change in me and where to change .... Just pushing me to the saddest part of my mind .
I feel everything unreal -
i 'm sad without any reasons ,
i'm dejected without cause
i feel hurt without any failure or relationship break up ....

suddenly i get a feel that i must start a New Life . Even now i dont know how to complete this post - may be i'm .. mm ... donno what i'm now ....

i dont even want to post this post ,a bit awkward feel ... ANyway .

P.s : the only thing i find interesting now -a -days is chatting with my lost school friend ,means studied in school - lost contact - found after 5 yrs , nice to chat with that friend , have a lots of distance between us , not easy to meet , so very exciting to chat with , also not a medico so again a relief to speak something other than my subject n listen to . .

p.p.s That friend is SHE enough ; go to sleep .

Thursday, October 1, 2009

TAG

FOund this tag interesting ...

Here are the rules:

RULE 1
You can only say Guilty or Innocent.

RULE 2
You are not allowed to explain anything unless someone messages you and asks!

RULE 3
Copy and paste this into your notes , delete my answers, type in your answers and tag to your friends to answer this.

So here I give my answers :

Asked someone to marry you?
Guilty.

Ever kissed someone of the same sex? Innocent.

Danced on a table in a bar? Innocent.

Ever told a lie? Guilty.

Had feelings for someone whom you can’t have back?
Guilty.

Kissed a picture? Innocent .

Slept in until 5 PM? Innocent.

Fallen asleep at work/school? Guilty.

Held a snake? Innocent.

Been suspended from school?
Guilty.

Worked at a fast food restaurant? Innocent.

Stolen from a store? Innocent.

Been fired from a some routine job? Guilty.

Done something you regret? Guilty.

Laughed until something you were drinking came out your nose?
Guilty.

Caught a snowflake on your tongue? Innocent.

Kissed in the rain? Innocent.

Sat on a roof top?
Guilty.

Kissed someone you shouldn’t? Innocent

Sang in the shower?
Guilty.

Been pushed into a pool with all your clothes on? Innocent.

Shaved your head? Innocent .

Had a boxing membership? Innocent.

Made a girlfriend cry? Guilty.

Been in a band? Innocent.

Shot a gun? Innocent

Donated Blood? Innocent.

Eaten cheesecake? Innocent.

Still love someone you shouldn’t? Innocent.

Have/had a tattoo? Innocent.

Liked someone, but will never tell who?
Guilty.

Been too honest?
Guilty.

Ruined a surprise?
Guilty.

Ate in a restaurant and got really bloated that you couldn’t walk afterwards?
Guilty.

Erased someone in your friends list? Guilty.

Dressed in a woman’s clothes (if you’re a guy) or man’s clothes (if you’re a girl)? Innocent.

Joined a pageant? Innocent.

Been told that you’re handsome or beautiful by someone who totally meant what they said? Innocent.

Had communication with your ex? Innocent.

Got totally drunk on the night before exam? Innocent

Got totally angry that you cried so hard? Innocent.


Arun give a try da...

Out of Medicine ...


Twelve weeks of medicine posting is over once for all ... It was Hectic but at late stage i started to enjoy it, it kept me busy 7.30 op , 10 .00 wards , 1.00 Theory class . Life was moving like a time table . Now its over and i still have its withdrawal effects , day seems very boring in Skin and STD department .

Being in first unit medicine is considered prestigious in our college , i'm glad i was posted in first unit . Only in first unit wearing a name badge is compulsory . Everything was methodical n systematic in first unit , as general rule i never fit in systems ;) so struggled a bit and moved in a pace to match others although i was not completely committed to it. Anyway its a happy Ending and i have no regrets with the unit or unitmates ... Though there were small medium misunderstandings within our unit ( 8 members) neither of us were interested in making it a big deal.

sooooo .... getting to relax now ( was relaxing in medicine also, but now without any guilty of wasting time) ... here comes the things which moved n got pissed me in unit ...

MOVED

1. The sincerity of the Department in teaching us , really inspiring .

2. vijayaraj ,my best friend was always by my side for three months in same unit , we both dint have such a long time together after First yr Dissection table .

3. fourth unit chief , the way he taught CNS .

4. DR.Rathnakumar.M.D - a man of fire , i ve never seen anyone such sincere in profession ,
i really admired the effort he took to teach us , the depth of his knowledge in subject was immense. The only thing i thought about him is HE IS TOO MUCH QUALIFIED for this job,
although many doesnt like him , i would say the sole reason is mere FRUSTRATION because of his knowledge n not able to be in his unit. He is also rather kind but you wont agree .

vijayaraj used to say this sir is an inspiration for how we must be in our future medicine profession. he really liked him.

PISSED

1. Got to attend two seminars both were long long narration about disease with incidence less than 0.1% , we cant leave the auditorium in middle so got suffered in those VERBAL DIARRHOEAS

2. got to attend a CME programme again the same thing what they do in US , UK - god i havent completed the line of treatment in india but they speak about intercontinental treatment ...

3. Unit gals , especially two made us really sick , dint co-operate with any things ( missed ganapathy if he has been with us he would ve brought the co-operation with his gimmick trick of attracting gals )

one gal in that pretended like hell , she has got a tag line " she never speaks to guys . she got no interest over guys , this n that " to prove her self tagline she doesnt tells even a essential details to us like about case for tomorrow , or findings . i personally knew that she speaks well to two guys in her old unit n make treats n fun with them , even she has been seen dinning with them n all , i dont complain about it n ve no pblm in it , my question is why the hell she pretends before us n in college to ve a name based on her tag line . Noone minds what others do or to whom we speak then why r u wearing a mask ? u r a damm fool.

The reason why i'm scolding her here s she happens to my kid sis's friend n once when i made strong comment against her my kid sis started to fire against me so i found this place would be safer :)

Then i had good time with vysakha , subramani, ramachandar...



so for now medicine is over with all fun n thrill now moving into surgery were i'm going to meet all my old rivals 6 member unit including me , 3 wont speak to me so that leaves 2 , one in that two is my kid sis n she ll be serious in unit n wont speak often , that leaves only one to speak , who is that one ;) ? It doesnt matter . Go on !!!